Singing & dancing replaced running & resting

So I haven’t’ written in a while. There is reason for this. Mostly it is because of my schedule with the show I am in. I’m in The WeddingSinger the musical – performing at Russell Sage College’s The Schacht Fine Arts Center in Troy, NY August5-7 and 11-14, 2011 Thurs-Sat. 8pm, Sun. 2pm

I’ve joked around with a fellow office runner that dancing in the show is my cross training. While I joke, it actually feels like it is. The past few weeks have been dance rehearsals for three hours a night in crazy humid situations. Yesterday was our first technical rehearsal, full wigs & costumes. It was a ten hour day. So I’m a little beat up today.

In actual running news, I’m checking out a 10K runners group. Ed, who has been at my two prideful running moments, sent me an email about Be Running.  Wednesday, August 3 · 7:00pm - 8:30pm at the Ciccotti Center - Colonie NY

I’m going to go check it out because really, I think I’m at the point of if I want to get better at running that I need some coaching and I need to learn how to run with a group. I’ve got a few 5K’s lined up for the rest of the summer and into September & October. So training for a 10K until October will be great, then I’ll feel a little better about training from October – January for a half marathon. 

I want to be back into running mode. I do. Still, I know I have to start from the beginning again because I now have the inserts. I know I also have to get back into good nutrition mode. That will come from not being busy every night of the week. I know that the summer has been hard for me to run in. That I prefer fall weather, which means running a month or so in the summer with my training going through August-December for a running season with major goal races. Then I can do a few fun runs during the summer and even think about taking on The Boilermaker again. 

Body image has also been what is killing me right now. Being sucked into spanks like materials under my costumes, while helpful, makes me feel unattractive when I am doing my costume changes. Seeing pictures of me where I am happy and jovial but am just not wearing the most flattering thing just makes me feel different. I know we all have different body image issues. I know I am not alone. I know women who I think are sexy and a healthy body size have their own thoughts and struggles too. It’s just that once upon a time I made a commitment to attack that and though I lost 50lbs, I’m at a plateau. So I have to fight harder to get through that plateau. I really want to go back to Fitness Together. I love the guys there; I love the work out set up. I just can’t afford it right now. My goal though with the 10K training group, is that I can afford once a week at FT and they would be my cross training.  They always helped me through my anger too, pushing me really hard and getting me to lift more than I thought I could. I want to get back to my 50 non-modified pushups in a minute too. That’s where I was before my accident and that’s where I want to get back to. 

So I’m tired. There is no way around that. I will be tired until August 15^th when the show is completely over. I’m thinking of trying a 5K on August 20^th, but I would have to leave right after to go down to the city for a wedding. I’m still debating the logistics.

The motorcyclist’s wave

It’s the same non-verbal greeting. The head nod, the flick of a hand, seasoned saying hello to the newbie, newbie checking out how others “ride”. The specialty clothes, the road races, the packs.

The reason it’s so similar – if it was easy, everyone would do it.The secret is every can do it – it just takes work. That wave, nod, recognition is acknowledging someone's hard work.

The reward is in the freedom the ride (or run) creates. Motorcyclists have all their patch of expo’s that they’ve gone to; have war stories of breaking down in the middle of nowhere. Runners have race bibs, finisher’s medals, stories of blisters, injuries, races that they struggled through, sometimes didn’t finish.

I watched a new motorcycle rider today. I always watch female riders. Because she was wearing sneakers  I shouted out AT GATT (all the gear, all the time) but I still watched. One foot was flat to the ground at stops; distance left between her and the car in front of her when stopping wasn’t enough to escape a backend crash. Then I saw her actually ride, her balance wobbled back and forth and I couldn’t help but wonder if I did that too when I would ride. I know that I’ve been off a motorcycle for two seasons, so I’m sure I would be wobbly picking up the 750 again.

I watch other runners run, usually when driving past them, sometimes when they run past me or in front of me. Sometimes I see their stride in time with my music, other times I see foot flopping, and legs that kick out to the side. I usually wonder if I kick out to the side or what my particular runner's wobble looks like.

At physical therapy the other morning my therapist watched me run. It’s still the flexibility in my left foot that is making my leg & arch tired which leads to bad form peter.  I’ve got to work up my calf muscles and do lots of toe raises on the stairs to build up my calf to support the full forefront running. My right foot kicks off the way it should but my left foot tires out and doesn’t follow through it just flops & stops.

In other news, I finally beat week 6 of Couch to 10K. I’m moving onto week 7 on Saturday because my legs are really tight and I’ve got to spend some time stretching.  The longer runs of an hour plus my stretching before & after and making my workouts approach 1.5 hours. While it’s worth it there are times when right after work it doesn’t fit into my schedule. I’m just not read to do the early mornings yet. I know I will eventually have to in order to get used to early race times and to beat the heat. This weekend I am going over to Parish, NY. On the way home I may stop in Utica, I may actually stay overnight there. If I do, then I am going to try and run a little bit on the boilermaker race route, or try to drive the route so I can see it all.

Also, next week is my first race. I don’t have any other goals besides put the race bib on and cross the finish line, and look like a fool. I really have all those things accomplished already. It’s a night race next week so if people want to come out after work and cheer me on that would be awesome. Ya know, signs like “zombies are chasing you” – things like that motivate me. Zombieland rule #1: CARDIO.

mini breakout

i've been absent. it's going to happen from time to time. While this blog is a project and it's something I know a few people look forward to reading, at times well i've just got nothing to say.

I was home from work Thursday & Friday due to some sickness. I really do think it was all of the overwhelming events that occurred last week that my body just told me to slow down. Since it's not second nature to listen to my body, it had to get a little sick in order for me to listen. I slept a lot and drank a lot of Gatorade.

Saturday I was feeling better and I had a party I was throwing at the house so I needed to get back into the swing of social life. I got up that morning and laced up my new running shoes and decided to go for my run. Week 6 of the Couch to 10K program is kicking my butt. I've had to repeat each run at least twice to actually make it through. Now that I am paying attention to the timing of my foot falls well my little heart and my little lungs are saying "hold on, we need to catch up to your legs." So my distance traveled has shrunk and my stomach and vomit tolerance are being pushed. (I haven't tossed cookies yet but it's been almost at least twice)

Also because my shoes were new I got a little blister from where my sock & orthopedic insert met. So today while at work I am one sock & shoe on, one sock & shoe off. I've got a run this evening and then I'm meeting up with good souls to learn what the Fall musical for Homemade Theater is.

It's also going to potentially be the first time anyone uses the random shower room that is in my office building.

So that's all I've got today kids because I'm hanging on and hanging in there.

beating a dead horse

I finally completed day 1 of week 6 in my couch to 10 K program. I had to repeat it three times before I made my way through the whole thing. A 5 minutes warm up, then run 3 minutes, and walk 2 minutes - repeat that 13 times, then a 5 minute cool down. That's a total of 73 minutes. it's the longest workout in the program and I had been dreading it the entire time.

With that 73 minutes I logged 5 miles. A few others things happened too.

I got my "in the zone gaze" down again. I explain it like this. Some people while in a desert hallucinate that they see water. I have a running image. I pick a focal point and I place that image there. I end up having tunnel vision and I don't see anything else. I keep my head up and my focus right on that point. Then I think about what that image means to me. It's validation, it's strength, it's knowing that someone believes in me.

I also felt the affect of forefoot running. I felt like I was going to fall over all the time but I didn't. When I trusted it, running felt easier. I was astonished on how after 5 miles my legs did not feel like lead. It was awesome.

I had a new play list too. I worked on downloading everything (cheaper than the itunes play list) of a 2.8 hour long play list where the songs were from 140 BPM to 180 BPM.

All of these things are great and I should feel a sense of accomplishment and I do. Yet, I couldn't get motivated to run yesterday. I also felt really fat yesterday even though my jeans were falling off of me. Mostly, I feel fat when I don't like myself. When I get angry at the decisions I make. Food can sometimes become a punishment. I ate a huge meal at 3pm and I didn't eat again until 9:30 at night and it was ice cream (which the being in the company of my favorite band made it totally worth it)

I knew what I wanted to do yesterday and I compromised again.  I wanted a small lunch, to run my run, and then to go up to see Wildwoodstock. I worked a conference over the weekend too, so I don't feel like I had any down time. I went from work conference on Friday to running, to dinner & sleeping at my friends house. Work conference Saturday, to an hour nap, to dinner & friends birthday, to being hungover, to lunch with my brother, to Wildwoodstock, to Stewarts, to Rotterdam. I want to get away and I really don't have the free time to do it, as the next three weekends are booked.

I'm hoping that I get some breakthrough, some thing that shakes me out of this funk that I am in. I shouldn't be sad and I am sad. I just play the part of not being sad really well. November is my season for SAD not May. It is bothering me that I feel no control over my emotions. It's another hope that as I put my first race bib on for the season that I'll get excited and that excitement will carry me from month to month, that I just need a little reminder on why I run.

My hips don't lie

My hips are so sore. My knees are right there too. At physical therapy we are working on the vastus medialis and the soleus muscles. When I was younger I often heard that my upper leg wasn’t strong enough to support my lower leg. I guess it’s still the case. It supports it but my legs have been over compensating in order to function. So my hips are extremely tight, my hamstrings are as well.  I am also working to get better flexion in my feet, ankles and toes to help strengthen my flat feet. 

Oh, I didn’t mention that I have flat feet? Yeah, that’s what my PT was saying. So my shoes are working right now but they might not be the best thing for me. 

So we are working on strengthening my lower legs but not overdoing it so I can still run. I am going to run tonight. I don’t care what time, I am going to go do it, preferably outside. 

I’ve got exercises to do while I’m at work sitting in my chair but they involve me getting a ball at the dollar store (which I’ll do later). My knee caps shift a lot during all this because my muscles are pulling them in different directions, same with my hips. So all this correction is making my hips and knees ache. 

I’m also finally signing up for the Freihofer's Run for Women. I should have done it a few weeks ago but I was side tracked and well today is my pay day.

Hitting the Wall

When I hear the words “Hitting the Wall”, it sounds like Ben Folds singing “Missing the War”. You could say I hit my first wall; I don’t really like to admit that I hit a wall but I did. I’m still in the middle of getting through it but I definitely fell flat into the wall yesterday.

Yesterday was my scheduled training run; it was also the longest run for the span of 14 weeks. It’s the first set of repeats where the running is more than the walking. I had gone to the park because all the trails are open now and it gives me a glimpse of running a road race where there is little inclines spread throughout the path. Monday I had run in the park and I logged 3.6 miles and with running & walking I was at a pace of 16’19” for the 1^st mile, 16’30” the 2^nd mile, and 17’21 the 3^rd mile. My legs felt like lead but I did two loops of the park.

Yesterday, I had been thinking about the long running time all day, it’s actually the workout I’ve been most scared of when I took an overview of the entire program. So mentally it’s a bit of a challenge for me. It’s the workout that when I get through it, I will know that the rest of the workouts are possible.

I started out on my run. It was cold & dreary but I loved running in that during my training in September & November. I made it through one full loop of the park. I was getting side stitches, my left shin was throbbing. I stopped to stretch my side out once and then stopped to try and stretch my shin out. I started walking after stretching out my shin and then the timer instructed me to “run now”. I tried. It hurt. Mentally I couldn’t fight that hurt.

I had been fighting all week mentally to not do something that makes me happy. I know that sounds stupid but I was trying to protect my heart. I felt so defeated after I stopped my run. I was having all of these thoughts rush through my head. EAT PIZZA was the first one. Then, eat ICE CREAM. Shovel food into your mouth, not for flavor but for gorging. Destroy your hard work, was the overarching theme. Drinking to excess & smoking also came to mind. I didn’t want to be thinking these things but they take over when I feel defeated. So, I stopped denying myself what I wanted. I called 3 people and sent an email from my phone saying I needed support.

The simple & silly conversation I had, the quick and dirty pep talk on my Facebook comments, the loving voicemail I was left, and the great shop talk evening phone call. It all gives a little spark to the soul and that’s what I need.

What I also came away with from all my conversations is that I am the one who sets my goals. Not other people. So what if I’m approaching death at the end of boilermaker? Die trying right? Also, I’ve got to find a sports medicine specialist, preferably one who is also an endurance athlete.  I’ve got something working in my left shin that I need to have someone look at.

My mini goals:

1.       See sports medicine specialist

2.       Count my stride rate – only focus on that

3.       Throw in one day of cross training a week.

Bad form Peter.

Last night I decided to use the treadmill because it was still a little windy outside and I had to be out for an hour and by the time I was finished it would have been dark out. So I stretched a little, got ready to start my workout, and I was doing really well. I made it to the 4^th out of 10 running section and then my knee started to hurt. It wasn’t a hurt that was a sore hurt it was a “hey I really notice that pain when I land” hurt. Then I started to notice the pain a bit more.  I slowed it down to a walk and I still noticed the pain.

I hobbled off the treadmill, up the three steps and I grabbed all my ice packs and set up the foam wedge on my bed so I could elevate my legs. I learned the R.I.C.E method of Rest, Ice, Compression, Elevation (plus take anti-inflammatory meds) from my many days of trying to be a varsity volleyball player (I really sat on the bench a lot) I wasn’t feeling any pain because I took my aleve and my Formula 303 and I just rested.

Last night I posted a picture of my sad story on facebook and got asked a few questions, so I’m going to attempt to answer them here…

My fancy ice packs for my knees. They are the greatest things ever. I own four of them so I could ice both knees and not have to worry about refreezing the ones I just used. You can get them through CVS’s website – they are called PEAS ice packs. The straps on them allow you to really get them snug to your knee, so I like them a lot. My other ice packs are from Walgreens and they are just the compression ice pack. I wish I had more of them because at times I could use two whole ones on each leg icing down my shins but I make do with what I have.

I keep saying how poor form caused me to twist my knee last night. It’s because I keep experimenting with my form. The best thing to keep in mind is to run with good posture. Keep your back fairly straight, keep your head up, shoulders relaxed, arms bent loosely but kept close into the body not swinging past your belly button,  imagine your hands are inside a snack size bag of potato chips, and keep your stride comfortable.

Yet there is more about form that you can work with. Many of my friends run with the POSE  or CHI method. I have read about them through various sites ( runners world )  and I try to grasp my head around them. This is where some of my experimentation lies. I try to lean forward at the ankles a little, I try to land on the middle of my foot instead of my heel, and I try to make sure my big toes are not crouching upward. I try to focus on my breath, think about my mental state while running, and let the sound of my strike pattern work like a metronome.  Running Warehouse has a way you can film your gait and send it to them that I keep wanting to do.

The only reason I mess around with my form is because my shins hurt when I started and my toes kept on curling upward, so I had friends who are runners who would suggest watching little things. There is also a really great photo time lapse series in the book The 4 Hour Body that shows how someone’s form can change from regular to proper form.  I say don’t get caught up in form when you are first starting to walk/run. I only started getting caught up in it during the C25K when I had to run my first 20 minutes without walking.  I do think about it a lot more now because I am going farther distances, trying to build my endurance, and trying to not tire out my legs as quickly as they are tiring some days.

So for right now, I’ll take my Saturday run off and I’ll try the end of week five for C210K on Monday. If things still feel weird I’ll give it another day and probably make a doctor’s appointment. But I can tell it’s not that serious of a pain and my leg is just a little stiff today, nothing a casual stroll outside at lunch time won’t cure.

The Long Haul

I think why I run, is to remind myself of how good I am.

I know, this sounds cocky. What I mean by it is, running is hard and at times painful but somehow I find the way to fight through it.

I hopped on the treadmill last night after a very long day of over thinking. I set the playlist and started the warm up. I was thrilled with only fifty-two minutes compared to Saturday’s Sixty-three minutes. I tested out some new stretches before starting and had found the most fantastic compression short that helps with the chafing issue. I rocked my blue headband, blasted a whole lot more Ke$ha than one should really ever own, and I started my work out.

The way the treadmill is set up in the back room allows you to look out of the window a bit. I try not to look down at the timer while I’m running inside because outside I never get to see how much time is left; I just trust the announcement that is made through my headphones.

Each work out runs the same way, five minute warm up then right into running for my allotted time, into walking/recovery, back into running again. The application counts down how many times it repeats and I can see a 4 out of 8 right underneath walk or run. So I know how many repeats I have left. The first two times of running are fine, the next two I’m often trying something new with form or speed, then the 4-6 repeats are the toughest. The ones where my asthma is very close to kicking in, where my shin decides to become tight, where my stomach decides to revolt from the stress of the day, or where my shoulder gets really annoyed at the movement.  In other words, it gets really difficult.

I often have this dead gaze while I’m running. Any member of my varsity volleyball team could describe the look. They also could describe the anger grunts that would follow my serve. These things come out while working on a hard part of my run. The grunts come out, the dead gaze is staring at the colorform’s craft decals my mother decorates windows with.  Often a squirrel is shouted at in my head.  At least once I tell myself to quit and get off the treadmill. It is always at least once.

Last night fighting through all the thoughts in my head throughout the whole day, while being on the treadmill having your legs feel exhausted because you are pushing yourself. Well, it reminded me that I can do the long haul, that I’ve always been able to do the long haul. A few of my friends reminded me of that last night through some great emails.

So I know it’s not going to get better instantly but I know I’m good for the long haul.

Running down a dream

At Christmas time my friend had said to me “soon you’ll be running 5K’s as an easy warm up run.”

I thought he was crazy when he said that. I mean, I knew he wasn’t crazy I just hadn’t imagined it.

Tuesday the treadmill was all set up, I got up early, and I plugged away on my C210K and finished up the third week. I was running at a clip of 5 mph when running and walking at 3.2 mph while walking. When I last ran on a treadmill my running speed was 3.7 mph.

As I ran my full 57 minutes I kept looking at the distance traveled. I was approaching the 2.8 miles that I normally run while training. I went past that. Then I hit 3.2 miles (an actual 5K) I threw my hands up in the air and was excited – but I was still running. At the end of it all it was a full 3.5 miles.

3.5 miles that I didn’t train for.

3.5 miles that I wasn’t putting on a race bib for.

3.5 miles that I was running at 6:30am before going to work.

It was a training run. That means walking & running. It took me 57 minutes to walk/run 3.5 miles. It gives me hope. It tells me that worst case scenario with The Boilermaker would be right at the three hour limit. After training several more weeks and getting to the point of full running, well who knows where I will be.  It’s kind of cool and it makes me smile.

Run my hood.



Week 2 (C210K)



Running in my neighborhood usually occurs on the weekend. I ran on Sunday and it was the same as every run I've had in my neighborhood.  I see the same people out walking their dogs, have the same dogs try and chase me, and know that when my C210K tells me to "run now" it's often in the same spots. I know where the pavement is uneven, know when I hit a mile before my application tells me. 

When I trained using my C25K it was warm out, people watched me run, some said good morning. I imagined that people saw my progress. I never imagined people saw the awkward faces I make, or the shouting at myself to "fucking get through it." But people see those things and hear those things too. For one part of my run I am on the main drag of our town. I know what I think when I see someone running or biking early on the weekends. I think that person is crazy. Mix in some weather that you'd need a jacket for and most people driving past you think you are crazy.

Here is what is crazy for me. It's week two of running. When I was in about week five of my C25K training this was my neighborhood run. It was 1.62 miles for a total time of 31.31. It's week two and I'm almost at 3 miles in 48 minutes.

Week 5 (C25K)

Right now in C210K's week two I run for 1 minute and walk for 4 minutes and I repeat this eight times. In C25K's week five I was jogging for 5 minutes and walking 3 minutes for a total of 31 minutes.

Do I feel good? Yes I do.

D., reminded me to stretch out really well after my run. So it was stretch central on the kitchen floor. Then it was a glass of water, two aleve's and my ice packs (with a little Ellen Page on the big screen)

On a side note, I was watching Whip it. If you know me, you know that was a big thing for me. To consciously choose to put the movie on and enjoy it without any associations.

A lot of good things happened to me on this run today. My running image shifted. I talked briefly about having a mantra or running image in my post 9 Weeks ago I never really let anyone know what my image was. I mentioned it once to one person. It used to be one person at the finish line standing there cheering me on. Now, it's larger. It makes me smile. It's my image and I probably won't give it up to anyone until after The Boilermaker.

From human to hardcore

When I started running back in September I wasn’t documenting my pitfalls. I was just letting my running application send notifications to Facebook and twitter that I completed another day in the couch to 5K training plan. Sometimes people would comment on my Facebook with words of encouragement or by talking of how they wished they could do something like that as well and that I made it seem easy. I often replied that I never told people about the crap involved with my training to run.

I made the decision this time to document my trials and tribulations. Let me be the first one to say that last night’s run was hard. It was hard for several reasons. I had a timeline of getting my run in, showering, and making it to an event. I was running a new route because the park roads were crappy the last time I ran there.  I was running in direct traffic.  I was running into the wind, I hit a puddle in my last ten minutes and had a cold and wet foot.  I had some shin stiffness and cursed myself for forgetting my compression socks.

I tag my runs on Nike +, it asks how you felt. Yesterday was a so-so tagged run. Running into the wind in the already cold air was difficult; difficult to keep motivation, difficult to keep paying attention to cars, difficult to avoid slush and puddles. It was hard on my lungs too. At the beginning of each week, when you increase the time you run compared to the time you walk, well for my asthma riddled lungs it rejects the increase in use.  I will phlegm up, spit more, and then I hear myself cough and wheeze for the next day until I have to return to running again. It’s not attractive.

Last night my plans shifted a bit but I still met some people out for a social engagement. As we sat down for dinner I felt my legs deaden, I knew after sitting for an hour it would be difficult to move around again.  I was passing out by 9pm and excusing myself from my company to then drive 45 minutes home and just take some Aleve and pass out.

Today my legs are heavy. My left knee has a bit of residual pain. My long term goal is what is replenishing my motivation because at times I let the idea of “a 15K is crazy” enter my mind last night.  So I have doubts too, I just have a history that tells me to push through my doubts and to endure the pain.  I’m just human trying to head to hardcore.

First day out

"To climb steep hills requires a slow pace at first." – Shakespeare

I need to keep reminding myself of this quote. That it’s not my speed but it’s my endurance, strength, and mental focus that I am trying to train. Speed, well that will come eventually most likely during training for a race after the boilermaker.

I brought all my stuff into work so I could change in the bathroom and drive over to the Saratoga State Park to run through the trails there. I started to change and I reached in my bag thinking that I had my compression tights to wear under my shorts. Nope, I had grabbed my shirt instead so I was just rocking some shorts. Shorts in winter weather when you aren’t going to be working up a huge sweat make one particularly cold. Yet, I wasn’t going to let anything stop me.

I got to the park, started up my C210K app and my Nike+GPS app and picked the appropriately named “F*ck you, I’m prettier than you” playlist and set out on my little run. I forgot that the first week is a lot more walking than running. Each path that I set out on would eventually fall prey to being closed off due to winter snow. Ended up running from the theater parking lot, past the theater, up to the clubhouse, and back to the parking lot like three times. It equaled out to 2.3 miles and that for the first time out made me feel really good, since 1.6 miles was my first time out during C25K.

What I noticed this time around was when it told me to run, I actually ran. During C25K I “old man jogged” each time I had to run. I focused a lot on my form and breathing when I did C25K. So when I started running my 30 second intervals I remembered slight lean forward, head up straight, loose arms bent at the elbow, with each step bring heels towards the butt as much as I could.

I found myself going a farther distance when I ran, actually ran. Yes, I was winded when I was running harder than my old man jog but I knew that is how I would build in the weeks to come. That if I pushed myself harder than my 5k training but not to the point of hyperventilating, well I’d be in better shape and run a little farther and faster.

Tonight I get my paycheck for one day. (Yep, I started one day before the pay cycle ended) So with that one day pay I’m buying some wind pants. I figure I will need them as Thursday looks to be colder than yesterday and I’m now in the mind set of every other day and trying to keep to the schedule. Now, if those park roads would just get a little cleaner, I’d be a happy camper.

Runnin' Rhino

I have 131 days to prepare to run 9.3 miles.

With my couch to 10k program app for the iphone I have 13 weeks of planned training. I then have four weeks of dedicated race training.

That's a total of 39 running days. 26 cross training days dedicated to my fitness level.

Then 12 race prep days and 12 cross training days until I go to Utica for The Boilermaker.

It's crazy.

Each time I talk about The Boilermaker race I keep thinking of The Boilermaker Special & my days working at Purdue)

Now, why do I have a beautiful rhino on a treadmill who’s trying to become a unicorn at the top of this post?

Several reasons, yet most stem from this shirt being one of my motivating factors in my fitness.

I started out with an XL shirt (It was cut off me due to my accident but my mom Frankenstein stitched it back for me) and now I have a size Large of the shirt. I decided as long as it’s reprinted at threadless.com I’ll get a new one each time I shrink out of the old one. So my health and fitness goals aren’t related to pound loss. They are related to can I run up the 3 flights of stairs to get to my desk and not be winded, or can I buy a size medium rhino shirt and not look like a stuffed sausage in the shirt. Long term I know how many pounds I want to lose but I also know if I focus on that I’ll get tripped up.

So tonight I run. Tomorrow I will let you know how that run went. Right now I’m looking forward to it.

Cold Weather Comforts

As I sit here and type it is pouring freezing rain outside. I’m not a complainer but I am a worrywart. See tomorrow beings my running training schedule. I thought by now I’d have my first paycheck, I’d be able to get a gym membership, a day pass, or run outside. I am still bringing everything with me to run outside tomorrow, however I am trying to find my motivation.

Tomorrow I will wake up drive to Saratoga, work, run, drive to Albany, get changed into my costume, have rehearsal, then drive to Rotterdam and completely fall asleep. When I first made March 1st my start date I didn’t have a second staged reading. I didn’t have a job either, so these things weren’t in my mind. Now I have both and I am seeking a way to recommit myself to my goal.

I get nervous every time I think about the boilermaker. I still know I can do it, or I believe I can do it with a little bit of doubt mixed in there too. I was the same way when I started out my training for the first 5k. I got excited half way through, felt great on days with a cold wet run, and found a focus.

Now I am looking out the window, reminiscent of the cold from walking into work, the wetness of having a hole in the sole of your shoe and one other big thing.

My asthma.

It’s been there my entire life and I’ve never controlled it well. I hyperventilated a lot during JV & Varsity volleyball but only on sprint suicides and long ladder runs. I was a smoker in college & grad school so I damaged my lungs even more. Now, it’s just the cold weather that kicks it up. While ice skating this weekend I found myself wheezing afterwards, not from exertion but just from the cold.

It makes me nervous for tomorrow. While it is supposed to be sunny it will still be around 33-35 degrees out when I go for a run. I’ll have to wrap a scarf around because I didn’t find a sports facemask that I liked. I’ll also be dodging some large puddles in the park and may have to switch my route around due to what areas are plowed.

None the less I still need to run. I’ve got 13 weeks of 10K training, and then I’ll have a month to add on the last 5K’s worth of distance that I’ll need to add. This goal is bigger, is harder, and is scarier. It’s a challenge. I just have to find my courage.

Spring Race Season

While my training starts in March for The Boilermaker 15K, I know that I want to do some 5K races to keep me entertained during my training. I also want to have fun for some of my races. So I determined races by location, historical notary, and if they sounded like a good time. My brother had run the Warrior Dash this past year and I wanted to run that with him but I had just gotten cleared for exercise after my shoulder surgery and there was no way I could run 3.1 miles - not to mention the damned hill that starts you out.

My training will be primarily using the Couch to 10K program app for the iphone. I used Felttip's C25K app in training for the turkey trot this past year and it was great. I also use the Nike+GPS app to keep track of my run routes & times. In addition to running, I'm also going to try out the Nike Training Club app to add in cross training & strength training. I will also be asking "J" & "MB" for training advice and tips.

Well, here is my Spring Race Season for anyone interested:

The Rotary Five - Queensbury, NY

Saturday, April 09, 2011

Urban Dare NY, NY (two member amazing race event)

Saturday, May 14, 2011 

The 33rd Freihofer's Run for Women Albany, NY

Saturday, June 4, 2011.

THE BOILERMAKER - Utica, NY

Sunday July 10th, 2011

The Warrior Dash - Windham, NY

August 13, 2011

Schenectady ARC 5K - Schenectady, NY

September 15, 2011

11th Annual Great Pumpkin Challenge – Saratoga Springs, NY

October 22, 2011

The 64th Annual Troy Turkey Trot - Troy,NY

November 24, 2011