As I sit here and type it is pouring freezing rain outside. I’m not a complainer but I am a worrywart. See tomorrow beings my running training schedule. I thought by now I’d have my first paycheck, I’d be able to get a gym membership, a day pass, or run outside. I am still bringing everything with me to run outside tomorrow, however I am trying to find my motivation.
Tomorrow I will wake up drive to Saratoga, work, run, drive to Albany, get changed into my costume, have rehearsal, then drive to Rotterdam and completely fall asleep. When I first made March 1st my start date I didn’t have a second staged reading. I didn’t have a job either, so these things weren’t in my mind. Now I have both and I am seeking a way to recommit myself to my goal.
I get nervous every time I think about the boilermaker. I still know I can do it, or I believe I can do it with a little bit of doubt mixed in there too. I was the same way when I started out my training for the first 5k. I got excited half way through, felt great on days with a cold wet run, and found a focus.
Now I am looking out the window, reminiscent of the cold from walking into work, the wetness of having a hole in the sole of your shoe and one other big thing.
My asthma.
It’s been there my entire life and I’ve never controlled it well. I hyperventilated a lot during JV & Varsity volleyball but only on sprint suicides and long ladder runs. I was a smoker in college & grad school so I damaged my lungs even more. Now, it’s just the cold weather that kicks it up. While ice skating this weekend I found myself wheezing afterwards, not from exertion but just from the cold.
It makes me nervous for tomorrow. While it is supposed to be sunny it will still be around 33-35 degrees out when I go for a run. I’ll have to wrap a scarf around because I didn’t find a sports facemask that I liked. I’ll also be dodging some large puddles in the park and may have to switch my route around due to what areas are plowed.
None the less I still need to run. I’ve got 13 weeks of 10K training, and then I’ll have a month to add on the last 5K’s worth of distance that I’ll need to add. This goal is bigger, is harder, and is scarier. It’s a challenge. I just have to find my courage.
i have asthma too. it's the worst in the cold! do you have an inhaler? i'm proud of you for sticking with your plan!! if you are interested in joining a gym, consider Planet Fitness or Best Fitness. they offer plans for $10/month with no commitment. you're awesome!
ReplyDeleteI do have an inhaler. I keep it with me on my runs. and the gym - i'm looking at PF because there is one close to my parents, and one on my way to work but i still have to wait for that first paycheck before I can even go in for $10. it's a sad occasion but i'm on the upswing of it.
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